More Than Muscle: Why Lifting Weights Can Quiet Your Mind
What if the most powerful part of your workout wasn’t the sweat or the reps…
...but the stillness in between?
In a world that glorifies busy and rewards hustle, strength training might not be the first place you expect to find peace.
But again and again, both in my own journey and with the women I coach, I've seen it become a portal to something deeper.
Not just stronger muscles.
But a quieter mind.
From Exhaustion to Intention
For years, I believed movement had to be high-intensity to be worthwhile. I taught and took part in all the energetic, adrenaline-fueled classes. I thought if I wasn’t gasping for air and drenched in sweat, it didn’t “count.”
But behind the scenes? I was hungry all the time. Exhausted. And despite all my effort, I didn’t feel stronger…mentally or physically.
It wasn’t until I slowed down and began lifting with intention that something shifted.
I noticed pockets of stillness I’d never experienced before.
Not the collapse-on-the-couch kind of stillness…but a grounded, present kind. The kind that whispers you’re safe here.
My Clients Felt It Too
Once I became a coach, I noticed the same in my clients.
At first, many of them were unsure. Is this slow pace doing anything?
Am I doing this right?
But over time, a pattern emerged.
They started telling me things like:
“That’s the first time my brain’s been quiet all week.”
“I actually felt my breath drop down into my body.”
“This is the only place where I don't feel overwhelmed.”
Strength training had become more than physical. It was a nervous system reset. A transition point from the chaos of the day to a sense of inner steadiness.
A doorway back to themselves.
"In a world that tells you to earn your worth through effort...
Stillness is a strength"
Why We’ve Resisted This
Many of us grew up with a narrow view of women’s fitness: shrink your body, keep moving, stay small. We were warned that lifting heavy might make us bulky. And we internalized the idea that sweat = success and stillness = slacking.
So it makes sense that rest feels uncomfortable. Even indulgent.
But here’s the truth: Stillness is a strength.
Especially in a culture that tells you to earn your worth through effort.
What the Science Says
A 2014 study published in Frontiers in Psychology examined the anxiolytic (anti-anxiety) effects of resistance training, and the findings are powerful.
Low-to-moderate intensity strength training (around 40–60% of your one-rep max) was shown to reduce anxiety significantly, even after a single session. These effects were especially notable in women.
It’s not just about mood, either. Strength training activates your sympathetic nervous system just enough to build resilience without tipping into overwhelm. Then, as you rest between sets, your body shifts into the parasympathetic “rest and digest” state… promoting calm, recovery, and balance.
That post-lift sense of calm? It’s not a fluke. It’s your biology.
Why Rest Matters (and Why It’s Hard)
If you’ve trained with me, you’ll know I programme rest periods intentionally, because they’re essential. When you lift weights, your body uses up ATP (its quick-access energy source). It can take up to two minutes to fully replenish, especially with heavier lifts.
But more than that, rest allows your nervous system to recalibrate. It’s when your body integrates the work you’ve just done.
Still, many of us find it hard to sit still between sets. We scroll. Fidget. Feel the pull to rush. Not because we’re doing it wrong, but because we’ve been conditioned to fill every pause.
So how do we start reclaiming rest as part of the practice?
Three Simple Practices to Stay Present Between Sets
Nasal Breathing
Return your breath to your nose as soon as possible after a set. This naturally calms your nervous system and promotes the production of nitric oxide, a molecule that supports blood flow, recovery, and even growth signaling. In other words, deep, slow breathing is doing the work.5-4-3-2-1 Sensory Check-In
A simple grounding tool:5 things you can see
4 things you can feel
3 things you can hear
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste or appreciate
It’s a beautiful way to drop into the moment and reconnect with your body.
Gentle Stretching
If stillness feels too much to ask, meet yourself halfway. A soft chest opener, a wrist release, or a seated twist can keep you present without overstimulating your system. You’re still resting, while you move with intention.
Bonus: Connection Matters
Strength training doesn’t have to be solitary.
Connection is a form of nervous system regulation too.
Whether it’s a smile from another gym-goer, a shared moment with a friend, or a supportive space like Strong Bones Club where we lift and laugh together… community is powerful.
It helps you feel safe enough to soften.
Supported enough to stay.
More Than Muscle
Strength isn’t just about lifting heavy. It’s about holding presence.
About knowing when to rest, and having the courage to do it.
About finding your breath… not just during the workout, but in your life.
So next time you train, notice the space between the sets.
Feel the quiet after the rep.
Let strength be your anchor - not your pressure point.
And if you’re curious about how strength training can support your mental clarity, your nervous system, or your midlife transitions…I’d love to help.
Book a free clarity call to explore what kind of movement and support might serve your season at carlykillen.com.
Resources:
Strickland JC, Smith MA. The anxiolytic effects of resistance exercise. Front Psychol. 2014 Jul 10;5:753. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2014.00753. PMID: 25071694; PMCID: PMC4090891.
