Big Feels, Busy Life: Navigating Depth in a Demanding World
Sometimes midlife feels like spinning five plates on one tired arm... while trying not to spill your coffee or your sanity.
You’re trying to be present in your career, patient with your kids, connected in your relationships, consistent with your workouts, and maybe even calm enough to meditate before bed. (Spoiler: sometimes you just scroll instead. That’s okay.)
They say you can’t be everything to everyone… but midlife will still ask you to try.
Some days, I feel sliced up like a pizza: each piece claimed by someone or something else.
My work.
My to-do list.
My hormones.
My inner voice that's begging me to take a nap.
Add in the pull toward personal growth; becoming your “true self,” finding your purpose, staying regulated... it’s no wonder we feel torn between worlds.
But it's all still in there somewhere for us.
The dreams we once chased. The roles we’ve stepped into. The quiet call to go deeper… even as the dishes still need doing.
For me, this theme has been showing up everywhere lately… with coaching clients, in my breathwork groups, my book club, and especially in my own reflections whilst reading Women Who Run With the Wolves (if you've read it or are reading it - I'd love to know how you're getting on).
That dance between the underworld of deep inner work and the topside world of everyday life.
Between soul and schedule.
Depth and dishes.
And if you’re anything like me, maybe you’ve found yourself asking…
Can I really do both?
The Daydreamer Who Became a Doer (ish)
Growing up, I was a classic daydreamer. The kind that got in trouble for staring out the window rather than finishing her worksheet. The only reason I ever got told off in school was for “not paying attention” a harsh blow to my tender, people-pleasing heart.
But it wasn’t that I didn’t care.
I just couldn’t always focus on what others told me mattered (hey ADHDer friends). My mind was full of stories, ideas, feelings. I lived in the deep.
Fast-forward to adulthood and postnatal depression shook me to my core. It taught me just how vital it is to be anchored in the world around me; in relationships, routines, and even responsibilities.
Determined to "do better" as I started to emerge from the fog... I swung the pendulum hard into practicality. Outward focus. Doing all the “right” things. But I couldn’t shake the sense that something was missing.
It’s taken time, therapy, Breathwork, and plenty of self-compassion to find my version of balance. To build a life that allows space for my inner world… without losing touch with my outer one.
To create a career that feels aligned. To support my ADHD brain.
To cook nourishing meals, keep up with strength training, walk in nature - all while still protecting space for quiet, reflection, and rest.
It’s not perfect. It’s never done.
But this, I’ve realised, is the real work of life.
Maybe You’re Feeling This Too
You’ve reached the goals.
You’ve built the home, the career, maybe even the family.
And yet… there’s still a pull.
A whisper of something deeper calling you back to yourself.
Maybe you’re starting to ask bigger questions about meaning, purpose, and identity.
Maybe you’re craving rest and reflection but feel guilty for wanting more than what you’re told is already “enough.”
Maybe you find clarity on retreats or holidays.. but day-to-day life keeps interrupting your growth.
If so, you’re not alone.
Many of the women I work with feel this same tension. They want to be present, grounded, and fulfilled - but life is noisy. There’s always something else to do, someone else to show up for, and the lie we’ve been sold as women rings loud:
You must do it all. Have it all. Be it all.
No wonder we’re exhausted.
So how do we stay connected to our inner world without disconnecting from the lives we’ve built?
First, Let’s Bust 3 Big Myths About Balance
🌀 1. Balance means perfect harmony.
Spoiler: it doesn’t.
Life isn’t a perfectly weighted scale. It’s a rhythm. Some seasons ask more of us in work, others in family, others in rest or creativity. The goal isn’t evenness… it’s awareness and intention.
🧭 2. Every area of your life holds equal weight.
Some things matter more than others - and it’s okay to name that. Your health, your peace of mind, your close relationships? They’re probably not up for negotiation. Laundry, inbox zero, and perfect meal plans?
They might not need to take centre stage right now (and sometimes they do).
⛰️ 3. You’ll “arrive” at balance one day.
Nope. This is a lifelong recalibration. The work doesn’t end when you hit your goal or finally feel “sorted.” Your needs, values, and energy will keep evolving — and that’s a sign of growth, not failure.
Which brings us to the practices that keep you grounded, honest, and tuned into what matters, even when life gets messy.
Simple Anchoring Practices for the Real World
You don’t need a silent retreat or a fancy planner.
You’d likely benefit more from a pause.
A breath.
A moment of remembering what matters most.
Here are some ways I return to myself when life feels noisy:
Take a Breath
Try this: inhale for 5, exhale for 5. Just for a minute or two.
The breath reminds you: you are safe.
The voice reminds you: you are here.
Body Check-In
Set a timer or use natural breaks (like boiling the kettle) to ask:
What does my body need right now?
Movement? Water? A moment of stillness?
Use the 20:20:20 Rule
Especially if you’re at a screen all day: every 20 minutes, look at something 20 feet away for 20 seconds. It’s good for your eyes and your nervous system.
Kitchen Dance Party
Pop on a feel-good song and let yourself move while dinner cooks or dishes soak. No choreography required… just joy (or pick something else if the idea idea of dancing brings your shoulders back up to your ears)
Tune Into Silence (or whatever you can find)
Silence is rare. But mindfulness lives in the small sounds too.
The bird outside. Distant chatter. A passing motorbike (a personal fave).
Let it anchor you to the now.
These aren’t about perfection. They’re about presence.
And they’re how we live with a foot in each world, without losing ourselves to either.
You’re Allowed to Want More
More rest.
More connection.
More meaning... even if everything looks fine on the outside.
You don’t have to abandon your life to reconnect with yourself.
But you do need to honour your inner world just as much as the outer one.
This is what I help women do — especially those navigating midlife shifts, ADHD, perimenopause, and the quiet hunger for something deeper.
Because you can do anything…
But you don’t have to do everything.
And you certainly don’t have to do it alone.
Ready to Reconnect With What Matters?
If you’re craving space to breathe, reflect, and figure out what’s truly next, I’d love to walk beside you.
Whether you’re deep in the in-between or simply feeling pulled in too many directions, a Clarity Call is your space to pause and get honest with yourself (without pressure or judgment).
🌀 We’ll explore what’s working, what’s not, and what’s quietly calling you forward.
✨ It’s free. It’s supportive. And it’s completely focused on you.
Let’s find your next right step…together.
Wishing you strength and ease
Carly x
